18 Years

It's been years since I've felt your heat and 

danced along the beach. Sand and sea sticking beneath my feet

I am eager to run through this land, inherited by every complexion.

Todo en mis sueños son viñetas del pasado

I am back after years away from mi país. 

I turned four, a Dominican cake with yellow frosting

the bachata, and loud tias ringing in my ears

ir al salón y mi pelo en un dubi

Innocent curls, that were punished for being unpredictable.

These curls yearned for freedom.

Ahora en mis rizos hay flores 

De la República 

un país de donde deseo

conocer sus bellezas. 

Imagino who you’ve become since wishing me felicidades.

If dirt roads had changed, if roofs were fixed, 

I hold onto little details longing for more than small moments. 

Do my cousins have the same fruit painting on display in their kitchen?

Are people still riding el motoconcho everywhere?

If only I could ride horses and jump into pools. 

Last night I had a dream, mariposas in my soil, 

y el sol I touch with mis manos 

that darken my skin to honey glow. 

Barefoot in land that sinks me in 

suplicando que nunca me vaya de mi raíz. 

I came from la tierra molded by mis Taínos 

y bendecida con los besos de mis abuelos.

Committed to getting my passport, y visitar la tierra nativa de mis padres.

Mami makes morir soñando en la cocina 

and I remember drinking from the white foam cups.

The smell of plátanos and salami, y queso frito,

comida de desayuno y cena. 

Aquí es mi lugar, where I will see myself reflected 

in crystal blue, mi corazón beating together to the steps of my Ancestors. 

In my dreams I am in the clouds y espero que me encuentre en tu tierra otra vez, 

for now sueño cuando soy una con tu tierra y sol.